All of us have our own agendas. There is something, no matter how large or small that each of us is trying to accomplish in our lives. I often see and hear others make a big ruccus about no one wanting to support them in their endeavours and I wonder, how supportive are they to others.
Sometimes it is not selfishness, but oversight that is the cause of our not being supportive. We get so caught up in what we’re doing, that everyone and everything else fades into the background as we believe that our agenda is of primary importance and that we don’t have time for others. This, however, is an antithesis to our success in our goals. When we fail to be supportive of others, we in fact, lead them to believe that we don’t care about them or their goals. Although this may not be the case, this is more often than not how our behavior is interperted. When we can put ourselves and our agendas aside for a few minutes, we become recognizable as persons who are also worthy of support.
I am usually generous in my support of others and their goals. So much so that I tend to get off track from my own. I have friends who also are in the process of struggling to manifest their dreams and because I have always been supportive of them, they expect my support at all times. Strangely, these same individuals rarely, if ever support any of my projects, yet still beat my door down repetitively for my support and become hurt when I don’t support them.
Recently I found myself feeling really put up on by their behavior and just stopped supporting them. I was about to tell them how I felt, but decided against it as I have a deeper appreciation for those who do things from their hearts rather than because I tell them that they should do it. Even if they capitulate, I question their sincerity. So, in this instance, I have said nothing. Please don’t misunderstand, I am not angry with them, disappointed, yes. I tend to project my beliefs about myself onto others and therefore have the false expectation that they should behave as I do given the same set of circumstances. Of course we know that this is a ridiculous assumption on my part, nonetheless it is one of my character flaws.
What I have learned is that even though the persons I expect to support, don’t, there are always new people coming into my life to support my projects. As always, the law of cause and effect prevails. What I give to others is returned to my life exponetially, but not necessarily from those I give it to.
The bottom line is this: regardless of how we perceive our friends, relatives and passersby, ultimately everything we give, we get. Being supportive of others opens the door for those who will support you to enter. We should hold an expectation of return of benefit, but should not waste our time determining where those benefits should come from or how. When we do this, we ultimately slander our frends, relatives and associates by denouncing them for failure to return our kindnesses. This slows the process of our return of good fortune.
So next time we think: All I did for____ and they won’t do for me! Remember, it’s not their job! Everything is returned in due time from the kindness and generosity of our own lives, not from the people we are kind, generous or supportive of.